Remember . . . an informal
visit or meal together is better than an elaborate situation with
unfamiliar customs.
Ask how your friend prefers to
be addressed. Enlist help in
pronunciation until you have it correct.
This will be an encouragement to him or her.
Follow any verbal invitation with a written note, including precise
directions and the exact date and time.
This will clarify any misunderstanding and serve as a reminder.
Let the student know how long a visit or activity will last and
offer transportation if necessary.
Read in advance about your
student's country, taking special notice of geography, customs, history,
political systems and the current situation.
Not only will this enable you to be more at ease and to relate more
intelligently, but it will also suggest appropriate questions you might
want to ask during conversations.
During your visit write on a
card or paper your name, address and phone number (and names of family
members or roommates) for your student.
Speak slowly and distinctly.
Avoid raising your voice—internationals are not deaf!
Though fluent in several languages, they may have difficulty with
English when it is spoken fast. Repeat
and rephrase things if necessary, especially instructions and invitations.
Avoid slang and idioms. Jokes
are often misunderstood cross-culturally.
Watch for nonverbal cues of misunderstanding. Explain anything you think may have been misinterpreted.
If in doubt—don't say it. Compliment
your friend when he or she speaks well.
Refreshments for guests are
the custom in most countries and always appropriate.
Offer them several times,
since in most countries it is impolite to accept the first or second time.
Learn greetings in your
friend's language and let them help you learn to speak their language. In addition to "hello" and "goodbye" and
"welcome," you can learn their special holiday greetings and
teach them yours, such as "Merry Christmas" and "Happy
Easter," discussing their significance
Where possible give your
friends a tour of your home. Some
items may be unfamiliar in their culture.
Be natural, but be sensitive to the fact that Americans are often
viewed as materialistic. Avoid
ostentation.
Be a thoughtful listener.
It shows you take your friend seriously and sets the stage for
deeper sharing. Listening
intently also helps you grow accustomed to different accents.
Ask questions.
Encourage your friend to talk about himself/herself, family and
country. This will both ease
loneliness and teach you a great deal about another culture. Avoid bringing up financial or political matters before your
friend does
Don't compare their country
with America. There are
always two sides to every issue and no one likes having one's homeland
belittled. At the same time, don't be surprised or defensive at negative
remarks about America. You
are first an ambassador of Christ,
not of the United States. Your
life will do more to refute criticism than your words.
Do not be afraid of struggles
in communication. Remember,
your friend is struggling much more than you are.
Patience, encouragement, sincerity and friendliness along with a
genuine desire to understand, will enable you to overcome any language or
cultural barrier in time
Share your friends. Invite your international friend to join you in your
activities with other Americans.
Make arrangements for when you
will see your friend again. This
is an assurance that you are genuinely interested.
Again, follow this up with a note.
Encourage him or her to come by from time to time, just to have a
quiet place to study or relax. Remember
that, as students, their first priority is educational goals.
Find out what times of the week and year they are free and when
they are busiest with schoolwork and unable to visit.
Telephone between visits.
Share your time. Never act in a rush with a foreign student.
Be sincere and relaxed.
Help your international friend
(when necessary) with practical needs such as an orientation to your
campus and city, show them where and how to bank, shop, pay bills, find
temporary or permanent housing, utilize public transportation, get and use
a telephone, locate medical and dental services, register for classes, buy
books, use the library and get academic help
Pray
regularly for your new friend.